! Lawyer Jokes ! Q: What do you call a lawyer with an I.Q. of 50? A: Your honor. Q: What do you call a lawyer who has gone bad? A: Senator. Q: How many lawyers does it take to roof a house? A: Depends on how thin you slice them. Q: What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? A: Not enough sand. Q: When lawyers die, why are they buried in a hole 36 feet deep? A: Because down deep, they are all nice guys! Q: How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? A: Cut the rope. Q: How do you stop a lawyer from drowning? A: Shoot him before he hits the water. Q: Have you heard about the lawyers word processor? A: No matter what font you select, everything comes out in fine print. Q: What do lawyers use as contraceptives? A: Their personalities. Q: How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb? A: Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant. Q: Why did the post office recall the new lawyer stamps? A: Because people could not tell which side to spit on.
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