There was a young lady from Leith,
  Who would circumcise men with her teeth,
  It wasn't for fame, Or love of the game
  But to get at the cheese underneath.
 
  There was a young actress from Crewe,
  Who remarked as the vicar withdrew,
  The Bishop was quicker, and thicker and slicker,
  And two inches longer than you.
 
  There was a young vampire called Mable,
  whose periods were always quite stable,
  at every full moon she took out a spoon,
  and drank herself under the table.
 
  There was a young plumber from Lee,
  who was plumbing his girl with great glee,
  she said stop your plumbing,
  I think someone's coming,
  said the plumber still plumbing "its me"!
 
  A kinky young girl from Coleshill,
  Tried a dynamite stick for a thrill,
  They found her vagina, in North Carolina,
  and bits of her tits in Brazil.
 
  There was a young man from Pitlochry,
  making love to his girl in the rockery,
  she said look you've cum, all over my bum,
  This isn't a shag it's a mockery.
 
  There was a young girl called Molly,
  who fancied a bit in a quarry.
  She laid on her back, and opened her crack.
  and the bastard backed in with a lorry.
 
  There was a young man from Harrow,
  who had one as big as a marrow.
  He said to his tart, try this for a start.
  My balls are outside on a barrow.
 
  There was a young girl from Devizes,
  who had tits of different sizes.
  One was quite small, almost nothing at all.
  But the other was big and won prizes

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