Q: Why aren't the England football team allowed to own a dog?
 A: Because they can't hold on to a lead.

 Q: What's the difference between the England team and a tea-bag?
 A: The tea-bag stays in the cup longer.

 Q: What's the difference between a packet of sellotape and Phil Neville.
 A: One's a glueless kit.

 Oxo were going to bring out a Euro 2000 commemorative cube painted red,
 white and blue in honour of the England squad. But it was a laughing stock
 and crumbled in the box.

Index