It was time for Father John's Saturday night bath, and the young nun
 Sister 
 Magdalene had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the old nun 
 had instructed. 
 Sister Magdalene was also instructed not to look at Father John's
 nakedness 
 if she could help it, do whatever he told her to do, and pray. The next 
 morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene how the Saturday night bath had gone. 
 "Oh, sister," said the young nun dreamily, "I've been saved." 
 "Saved? And how did that fine thing come about?" asked the old nun. 
 "Well, when Father John was soaking in the tub, he asked me to wash 
 him, and while I was washing him he guided my hand down between his legs where 
 he said the Lord keeps the Key to Heaven." 
 "Did he now?" said the old nun evenly. 
 Sister Magdalene continued, "And Father John said that if the Key to 
 Heaven fit my lock, the portals of Heaven would be opened to me and I would 
 be assured salvation and eternal peace. And then Father John guided his 
 Key to Heaven into my lock." 
 
 "Is that a fact?" said the old nun even more evenly. "At first it hurt 
 terribly, but Father John said the pathway to salvation was often painful 
 and that the glory of God would soon swell my heart with ecstasy. And it 
 did, it felt so good being saved." "That wicked old devil!" said the old 
 nun. "He told me it was Gabriel's Horn, and I've been blowing it for 40 
 years!" 

Index