ARTIFICIAL INSEMINATION: Procreation without recreation. There's this couple. He's 87 and she's 86 years old. They just got married and are on their honeymoon. In the Hotel room, she slips into something sexy and crawls into bed and waits for her new groom. He's in he bathroom sprucing himself up. She waits.. and waits.. 'til she can't wait any longer. She gets up and goes to the bathroom and opens the door. Peering in she sees him bent over on the toilet trying to put on a condom. She asks "Honey, what are you doing?" and giggles. "I'm 86 years old and can't get pregnant anymore." He looks up at her and says "I know, but honey, you know how the dampness effects my arthritis." Two honeymooners are walking down 42nd Street, when they saw a sign advertising 'The Great Gonzo' outside a theatre and decided to give the show a try... So, into the theatre they went.... There was a fanfare and the Great Gonzo came out on the stage... He was a young man dressed only in a bathrobe... He opened the robe to show the biggest, hardest erection imaginable. Then he clapped his hands and a young woman emerged pushing a cart, on the top of which were three walnuts. The Great Gonzo took his erect member in his hand and one, by one, smashed the walnuts, to the thunderous applause of the audience.... This year this same couple decided to celebrate their 40th anniversary with a second honeymoon in New York City. While walking down 42nd Street, they once again see a sign advertising the Great Gonzo... With a bit of surprise, they decided to check out the show again.... Once they were in the theatre, the fanfare played and Gonzo, now an old man,appeared in his bathrobe ...He opened the robe and there was the erection, as big and hard as ever... This time when he clapped his hands, his now aged assistant appeared with a cart on which were three coconuts... To thunderous applause, he used his member to smash each of them... The couple couldn't resist going up to Gonzo after the show.... They explained that they had seen him 40 years earlier.... 'But why,' they asked, 'Did you switch from walnuts to coconuts?'... 'Well,' he replied, 'When you get old your eye's start to go'... Five year old Little Johnny was lost, so he went up to a policeman and said, "I've lost my dad!" The policeman said, "What's he like?" Little Johnny replied, "Beer and women!"
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